Curriculum Frenzy

I have been eating, sleeping and breathing school curriculum for Monica. I'm so afraid that I'm going to mess this up. She is so eager to learn. Her school is not doing the job right now. Then I say to myself, "What makes me better than the school? How can I possibly do the job better?" Someone told me two weeks ago that I am the mom and God gave me that job. I guess that if God appoints me to a job, I have it in me to do the job and I better do it. It's a lot of pressure to think that my daughter's education is in my hands. She is more brilliant than I ever thought of being.

Monica has never once had a teacher that was able to teach her to her level. Her third grade teacher came close. Her third grade teacher refused to use textbooks. I was very concerned about it at the time (Who does this teacher think she is that she can teach without the aid of textbooks?) Now that I've been doing major curriculum research and I see how dumbed down they are, I know why she refused to use textbooks. They are useless at their grade level. For Monica to have any challenge at all she is going to use some sixth grade texts.

I would love to find a Christian curriculum that I feel is "college prep," but I haven't found it yet. What a shame. They charge enough money for them. I'm not saying that children being taught with Christian curriculum don't have the opportunity to go to college, but do they have the opportunity to go to the college of their choice? This is a huge concern of mine. I don't want to deny my child the opportunity to go into the field of her choice because she can't get into the college that she chooses.

Yesterday when I was discussing some of Monica's classes with her, I stated that I wouldn't be testing her in the Bible class I've put together. I want her to focus on studying and learning the Bible and not worry about yet another test. She said that she would prefer it if I did test her. She craves structure in every area of her life. I don't think I've done a very good job of giving it to her.

Only time will tell if I'm up to the task.