Monday, September 05, 2011

The End of an Era

Tomorrow is the first day of school in our area.  I'm sending three beautiful girls off to school.  My oldest starts high school tomorrow.  Even though she is holding her head high, I know she is scared.  My middle girl is starting 2nd grade and my youngest is beginning her journey with kindergarten.  It all happened so fast.  I have no idea where the time has gone.
My goal with eating raw is to live healthier and LOSE WEIGHT.  In high school I weighed 125lbs and had a very athletic body.  My children have never seen me like that, nor could they imagine me like that.  The other day I was school shopping with the two youngest.  My 5 yr old looked at me and said, "Mommy you are getting skinny!" really loud, right in the middle of the store.  I was proud of myself for losing weight and proud of her for noticing.
I haven't gotten along with my 14 yr old for a while.  It's been something that I just brush off because I know she's at that age where everything I say is stupid.  I have realized that since I've been losing weight, she has been communicating with me.  I've always known that my weight embarrasses her.  I just didn't realize that it was so bad for her that it actually affected our relationship.  I'm starting to see that is the case.  I can't blame her for being that shallow.  She's only 14 years old.  All she thinks about right now are looks and style.  So at least twice a week, I update her on my weight loss.  I can tell that she is happy about it and proud of me.
This fall marks the end of an era.  Actually, the end of two eras.  I will never have another child in preschool, all my babies are in school starting tomorrow.  Secondly, I will never let myself get that overweight again.  This summer has been a turning point in my life.  I know that all my children love me.  I'm not doing this for them, I'm doing it for me.  Their approval and pride in me is, however, an added bonus.

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