Sunday, September 11, 2011

10 Years Later

Of course I remember where I was, what I was doing and the emotions and disbelief that filled my soul.  10, 20 or 50 years later, that will never change.  The tears I've shed watching the television the last two days are as if I was transported right back to that moment.  It will not change.  It can't be undone. 

As we go through life, many things happen that we wish we could just turn back time and warn people about impending disaster.  If we could would they believe us?  If someone told me on September 10, 2001 that within 24 hours we would be attacked by terrorists and thousands would die, I would have laughed and called them crazy.  No one could ever breach the defense of this country.  Well, it did happen and there isn't anything that anyone can do about it.  

So what now? 

We go on with life.  A new appreciation for life.  Love your life and the people in it.  The stories of bravery and humanity that come out of this disaster have lived for 10 years and I pray that they live on for hundreds or thousands of years after this.  My favorite quote from this weekend was made by Joe Biden, of all people, at the memorial for flight 93 in Shanksville, PA.  He was quoting something his mother told him many times when he was young.  She would tell him that courage lies in every heart and some day it will be summoned.  That's a quote that I will keep with me.

May God comfort the families and friends who suffered the loss of life on that dark day 10 years ago.
Never forget the bravery.
Never forget the sacrifice.

9/11/01 ~ NEVER FORGET

Monday, September 05, 2011

The End of an Era

Tomorrow is the first day of school in our area.  I'm sending three beautiful girls off to school.  My oldest starts high school tomorrow.  Even though she is holding her head high, I know she is scared.  My middle girl is starting 2nd grade and my youngest is beginning her journey with kindergarten.  It all happened so fast.  I have no idea where the time has gone.
My goal with eating raw is to live healthier and LOSE WEIGHT.  In high school I weighed 125lbs and had a very athletic body.  My children have never seen me like that, nor could they imagine me like that.  The other day I was school shopping with the two youngest.  My 5 yr old looked at me and said, "Mommy you are getting skinny!" really loud, right in the middle of the store.  I was proud of myself for losing weight and proud of her for noticing.
I haven't gotten along with my 14 yr old for a while.  It's been something that I just brush off because I know she's at that age where everything I say is stupid.  I have realized that since I've been losing weight, she has been communicating with me.  I've always known that my weight embarrasses her.  I just didn't realize that it was so bad for her that it actually affected our relationship.  I'm starting to see that is the case.  I can't blame her for being that shallow.  She's only 14 years old.  All she thinks about right now are looks and style.  So at least twice a week, I update her on my weight loss.  I can tell that she is happy about it and proud of me.
This fall marks the end of an era.  Actually, the end of two eras.  I will never have another child in preschool, all my babies are in school starting tomorrow.  Secondly, I will never let myself get that overweight again.  This summer has been a turning point in my life.  I know that all my children love me.  I'm not doing this for them, I'm doing it for me.  Their approval and pride in me is, however, an added bonus.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Big Day Tomorrow

I have a second interview at a local cancer center.  I had my first interview with them on Friday.  This is HUGE!  I'm so nervous.  It's a clinical interview so I will be working with the therapists and helping them treat patients.  I will be glad to be around patients again.  I truly love what I do.  I'm just so nervous about the fact that I have to impress everyone again tomorrow.  Probably an interview with the Dr too. 

I have been on a green smoothie feast for 2 days now.  My first goal is 10 days.  If I make it there and feel as good as I do now then I will continue for 30 days.  Who knows how long I can keep this up.  I just want to be healthy.  I drink 3 - 5 large smoothies a day.  I feel surprisingly satisfied.  I feel so healthy right now.  I see the raw food lifestyle as something I can hold onto and be proud of it.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

No Stopping Me Now!

So I woke up today and weighed myself.  It's a big day.  I finally broke that 200lb mark that I've been sitting at for a week.  I officially weigh less than 200lb for the first time in about twelve years.  Yay me!  I have yo yo dieted for the past 14 years.  Only once did I get past 200 in fact I got down to 175 but that was on the Atkins Diet.  There's no way I could eat like that for the rest of my life.  It all came back roll by roll.  I've been close to 200 before.  I even have a WW card that says 201 on it from 5 years ago.  Last year I got down to 203 on Sparkpeople.  Each time I got close to 200 it was like I hit a boiling point and went back to my old way of eating.  YUCK!  For me it seems as if 200 has been the Sabotage mile marker for me.

Well not this time!  I love the way I'm eating.  I don't want to stop here.  This is the only "diet" that I can honestly call a "lifestyle".  Raw Foodism is the best thing that's every happened to me.  I feel radiant.  I feel vibrant.  I feel lighter!

Friday, August 19, 2011

Miserable Night at Work

What a miserable night at work.  I hate my job but am thankful to have it right now.  I work part time at a shoe store in the mall.  That is NOT what I spent the last 4 years in college to do but that's what's available to me now. 

People are pigs.  I found a dirty diaper and a half eaten sub when I was straightening up tonight.  If you are like that at home fine.  But seriously, people come out in public and expect me to pick up this mess.  Hey, if you get ten pairs of shoes off the shelves, at least make an effort to put them back.  I don't pick up after my children like that!

Whenever anyone is in a customer service, hospitality or retail job, it seems as if there is a certain percentage of the population who automatically thinks that you are subservient to them.  It's not the people who you'd think would act this way either. 

Oh yeah and I'm going to say that if you knew what I knew (and see every day) you'd never buy a pair of shoes again.  People sliding their dirty, nasty, unsocked foot into every shoe they can get there hands on.  Yuck!  That's all I can say!

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

If You Could See Me Now

Before I start on this post, let me be very clear.  There will be no picture!

I got home tonight at 9pm ready to run upstairs and read.  I checked email and FB first.  Before I could grab my book, my hubby came in to go to bed and turned out the light.  I guess I'm not reading my book.  Okay I guess I will hang out in the wide world of internet for a while. 

Next, the two smaller Smalls came into our room.  I'm scared, I feel sick, it's too hot in our room...and so on.  I'm sure you get the picture.  The tallest of the Smalls is downstairs watching a movie.  I'm not going to just kick her out after we told her she could hang out down there.  So I decide that I'm going into the kid's bedroom for some peace and quiet. 

I grab my computer and book and head in.  It's a mess (I know what my kids will be doing tomorrow).  I can't just sit on their beds with a computer or book.  Way too uncomfortable and the lighting is not right for reading.  So I kick debris aside and grab the video game chair.  It's one of those rocker chairs that's low to the ground.  I place it in between the two twin beds and am sitting here typing away. 

I do look ridiculous but at least it's quiet!

Wordless Wednesday

Linking up with Wordless Wednesday
For the past 4 years I have been immersed in college.  My life was school work.  Well now that it is over, I don't have that looming workload over my head constantly.  I can do things like read, crochet, knit and other relaxing projects.  About a week ago Alex asked me to make her a blanket.  I couldn't say no to her so guess what the current project is?  It's a blanket / afghan.

Here's the beginning of my project after one 7 oz skein of yarn.  It is 46 inches wide and 11 inches tall.  I am guessing that I will be using approximately 3 lbs of yarn because I want it to be on the bigger side so that the blanket is something that she can grow with.

I'm using worsted weight yarn, a J hook and a slanted shell stitch pattern.  I started with a chain of 172.  You have to chain a multiple of 5 then add 2.  This is a link to a tutorial for the slanted shell stitch pattern.  I've used this stitch pattern before for blankets.  It is very durable.

Luci saw this and likes it so much that I have to make her one too.  If I make one for the two then I have to make one for my oldest daughter.  Maybe I'll be done by Christmas?  My hands are going to be busy for a while!

Monday, August 15, 2011

Science Center Fun

So the Smalls love to go to the Science Center.  We have a family membership which is reciprocal at two local science centers and a museum within an hour drive.  Here is a picture of Alex at one of the exhibits.  Fun day for the whole family!

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday

Sundays mean two things to me right now...Church and Coupons!  Let's start with church.

I love my church (which is the way it should be).  I go to .  Their motto is "Come as you are and be loved."  I know that is the way it should be at all churches, but in my experience, that is not the case.  This church lives it 100%.  I feel as though I could walk into that church regardless of any situation going on in my life and I am going to feel love.  I am fortunate to go there each week and share a community with the people there.  The service is uplifting.  The people are happy.  It truly inspires me to be a better person every time I come away from service and I am grateful for it.

I also clip coupons on Sundays and check out weekly deals at each store in town.  I love couponing and come away with many great deals (several are usually free) each week.  It is an art and a challenge to find the best possible deal each week.  I never thought I'd see myself enjoying this so much.  When I come out of a store with loads of items and pay a minimal amount for them, I feel like a conqueror of sorts.  What am I conquering?  Who knows.  All I know is that I'm sick of these large retailers taking what little money I have right now.  If they have a coupon policy that enables me to get free items, then I will take advantage!

Sundays are going to change very soon because I am ready for some FOOTBALL!  I imagine I will somehow clip coupons while watching football after getting home from church.  These will make for some VERY happy days!

Yes, I'm Still Alive

I haven't been around because...
I haven't written because...
Truth is that my chaos has not been balanced.

What has gone on in my life in the last several years?  School, school and more school.  But guess what?  I have officially graduated.  I have a Bachelor's in Radiation Therapy.  I successfully passed my boards.  I now have letters after my name.  I love what I do :)

Just one problem with it all... I NEED A JOB!  Yes, unfortunately, this poor economy has even affected healthcare.  I continue to have faith.  I will get a job soon.  I just have to be patient. 

Other news:  I have an oldest daughter starting high school, a middle daughter starting 2nd grade and my youngest starting kindergarten.  My youngest is way ahead of the game.  She decided to start reading this summer. 

I started a raw food diet and I love it!  I've lost 20lbs and feel great.  I will be posting more on this later. 

Since I don't have a job and I'm no longer in school, I have all this extra time.  I've been reading, crocheting and knitting.  I'm going to post more on this blog as well.  Two of my children (the ones that still love me) asked me to knit them blankets.  I only knit clothes.  A blanket would take me 8 years.  By that time they would hit "the dark teenage years" and wouldn't care about me or the blankets so I decided that crochet would be a much better idea.  It just goes quicker. 

I promise I'm going to change the look of this blog as well.  Someone commented that it needed to be done so I'm going to see if I can do so without messing everything up.  I'll give it a whirl.  I'm thinking something brighter.  We'll see what I can come up with.  Of course, I have to go to one of those free template sights because I'm just not that technologically talented. 


Kimberly (LastName Goes Here), RT(T)